


Magis Quam Cogitatio

by Jolanikati



Series: (HxH) Mafia Boss AU [2]
Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst, Drama, Fluff, M/M, Mafia Boss AU, Psychoanalysis, gun - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-13
Updated: 2017-04-01
Packaged: 2018-09-08 10:47:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8841604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jolanikati/pseuds/Jolanikati
Summary: A seven chapter series based on something I wrote in the beginning of this year that wouldn't leave me head. Chrollo Lucilfer is an upcoming CEO for a corporation that also works as a mafia in the backgrounds, a mafia that he is the boss to. This is the story of what happens when he decides to start dating Kurapika Kurta, an undercover agent for the CIA.





	1. DAY 1: FROST

**Author's Note:**

> For the first day of KuroKura Week 2016 (which I am fabulously late to), Frost.

**D A Y    1 : F R O S T**

It started out small, like most things do. It was subtle, and he only noticed what was happening when the first frost of the season came about. The way the others laugh sounded like bells; the way his hair shined like halo around his head; the way that when he was interested in something his eyes would shine with intelligence and curiosity; the way his face became so open when he was caught off guard by a kiss to the cheek; the way his face slowly got more scarlet from both the embarrassment of a public display affection and being teased; the way that, when he thought Chrollo was asleep, he’d kiss his forehead and tell him good night before bringing him a blanket when he was on the verge of passing out on the couch. They were small, and it should’ve tipped him off earlier when he was describing these things to Feitan, casually and nonchalantly, the way he usually talked when it was just the two of them.

Feitan had seemed worried, but he brushed it off. It was simply observations after all, and he was only entertaining himself until he got bored of his presence. His adoptive brother didn’t seem reassured in the least. It was understandable.

Dating an undercover agent from the CIA was a pretty risky move for the leader of a mafia, but he argued his case nonetheless. He’d always been more than careful, and this wasn’t as bad as the time he had invited an FBI agent right into their main base of operations to prove there wasn’t anything fishy. There was obviously, but the agent had been convinced that it was indeed a very normal room belonging to an overly wealthy man. Needless to say, he had scared his comrades to death on several occasions, but he’d never been caught, and that’s what mattered.

His brother, of course, rolled his eyes at all of this, making sure to scold him for his recklessness. Can you believe this was actually now the fifth time they'd had this conversation? He insisted Kurapika was different, that he wasn’t as dense and that no amount of charm would bring his guard down to his suspicious activities. While Feitan wasn’t wrong, that made the situation all the more alluring. He shrugged and bid a good-bye as he headed out for another date with said blonde, where he was told to be careful too many times before he could actually leave the room.

When he saw Kurapika waiting in the foyer, he couldn’t help the smile that stretched across his face. He was wearing the beanie he had bought him the week previous, and since he was letting his hair grow out, the golden locks framed his face nicely, shifting slightly as he turned to Chrollo. Catching his eye, the agent smiled back enthusiastically, and he could say with certainty that it no longer felt like winter. The blonde met him halfway up the stairs he was walking down and hugged him, surprising one of the maids nearby, but he paid no attention to them. Reciprocating the hug, he allowed himself some time to enjoy the warmth it brought him. He took a step back, laughing a bit at how red the other’s nose was because of the cold outside. The blonde pushed him back a bit at realizing this, but continued to wear the same genuine smile the entire time. As they ventured outside, he noted that the frost from earlier in the season was now pure snow, as pure as his significant other was.

Sure, they had probably seen the worst humanity had to offer, but that made them no less innocent to the ways of the world. Neither of them had ever considered dating before, seeing as it was never really any sort of priority, and yet somehow it had happened, making them each other's first “other” to speak of… and it was truly as pure as the snow was white, and really, wasn’t a symbolization of winter transformation? The death of the old way of life, which had been filled with day after day meetings and illegal trades and black market negotiations. Now, he had this lovely being in his life. No doubt it was the highlight of his day and...

He paused, causing his date to look back at him, confused. Chrollo quickly smiled, saying that it was nothing and continued walking, but a thought still plagued his mind. It was all so contradictory to what he had told Feitan earlier.

_Since when had he started lying to his own brother?_

He shook his head, looking down at Kurapika fondly as he pointed at some window showcasing something that he had thought Chrollo would like. He kissed the top of his head instead of giving a verbal response, which made the blonde cover his face with one hand as he dragged Chrollo behind him with the other, not wanting to show him that he was embarrassed.

He chuckled to himself as his thoughts continued to race. No, of course he hadn’t meant to lie to him. That was just his instincts of self preservation kicking in again, not wanting to show off any perceivable weaknesses. He’d have to apologize later though. He was his one true confident; he didn’t need to be lying to the one person he could tell everything to, but that would mean coming to terms with his own feelings. His _genuine_ ones at that. He had said he would leave when he got bored, but truthfully, he hadn't gotten bored once over the past six months since they had met at New York City on accident. He shook his head at himself. He was really asking for a scolding from his little brother now.

Abruptly, his mind was pulled from his thoughts as Kurapika led him to a small park area with a large Christmas tree adorned with several lights and ornaments in the center.

“I wanted to show this place to you, because my family came here every year after I'd get out of school,” the blonde next to him spoke warmly. “When my parents passed earlier this year, I didn't know if I'd be able to come back here at all. I thought that it would be too much for me.”

_Oh no._

“But you've given me a lot of courage since I've started seeing you, and I'd just like to thank you for that.” Kurapika squeezed his hand, looking straight ahead at the tree as he spoke, tears threatening to fall from his eyes. Seeing that, he almost felt like crying himself, and there was no way to explain what he was feeling. Chrollo quickly tried to think of any reason why he could be feeling that way but every reason he came to he knew was just plain absurd, and lying to himself was the last thing he needed right now. “You've done so much for me, and so I wanted to show you something that would properly convey how I felt about that.”

Before he could think of the consequences, Chrollo was already hugging the man next to him. He could tell it had shocked Kurapika, but he understood what was happening and returned the sentiment, burying his face into the crook of his neck.

“You don't need to say anymore.” Chrollo said, and he found it quite hard to keep his voice from warbling, so he just stopped talking and let his boyfriend cry into his shoulder. His heart longed to be able to do more for him, and that's when it clicked. These small things were no longer just small individual happenings, this wasn't just for entertainment.

This was bigger than that.

This was _love_.


	2. DAY 2: RED

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the second day of KuroKura Week 2016, Red.

**D A Y   2 : R E D**

None of this was new. Not the blood dripping down his arm nor the blood splatter that trailed up his torso from a shotten comrade, standing a little too close and thankfully not fatally injured. He closed his eyes but he could still see it. Red. That blasted color. His eyes might as well have been that color with how often he saw it. 

He looked over to his partner and flatmate, Senritsu, who gave him a half-hearted smile. He returned the sentiment, grabbing his coat that lay across the office chair next to him. They made their way out, Senritsu offering to buy him some coffee as they exited. 

“You know I don’t drink coffee, Melody.”

She looked his way at the nickname, but shrugged as she held open the door for him, shivering as the cold wind hit them. “One day you’ll cave Kurapika, the caffeine boost helps get you through the particularly tough cases like today.”

He hummed, but shook his head after a moment of thought. “I think not. Tea and the occasional soda is the most I’ll get of caffeine in a single sitting, besides, usually I have problems  _ going _ to sleep, not staying up.”

“That’s true, and are you sure you don’t want the orchestral CD I offered you? It really does help with sleep, I promise.”

The blonde laughed, waving off the suggestion. “Maybe some day, but as for tonight, I’ve still got some paperwork to do and-”

“A date to bang?” Senritsu casually threw out as she pulled out her phone, pretending as if she had said nothing out of the ordinary. Kurapika spluttered, sending her the best glare he could muster at the time.

“We do not,” he replied after she gave him an unapologetic smile, “and even if we did it would not be in the flat.”

“That’s suppose to make me feel better about you going over to his place?”

“No, but…” the blonde sighed. “Melody, he’s a good guy. He’d never do anything to put me in danger or make me feel uncomfortable.” 

“Perhaps, but we can’t be for certain until you let me do a background check.”

“I’m not letting you do that,” Kurapika hissed, voice quieting as if someone was going to overhear them on the empty street. “Just because he happens to be wealthy doesn’t mean it’s because he's involved in something illegal or that he’s hiding a secret past.”

“Ah, but they always do.” Kurapika rolled his eyes as Senritsu chuckled. “Okay, so maybe not always, but for the most part they don’t have a squeaky clean reputation. I bet you a whole week of dinners that there’s something going on.”

“You’re not baiting me into this.”

“Okay, I get it, dinners are pocket money for you now, but what if I let you get a cat? Huh? C’mon, you’ve been asking me to let one in for what seems like forever.”

“I think you’re just finally coming around to the idea of one,” he teased, hoping to get away from the conversation. Ever since she had found out about the relationship, she thought it was the best reason to finally check up on his background, never mind that it was the whole reason he had met up with him to begin with. She thought, at first, that the whole relationship was to get more information out of him, but Kurapika had adamantly refused that was the case. It’s not like he had jumped into the situation without giving it a lot of thought. 

Senritsu was always particularly good with her hunches on people, and usually of which helped them in their undercover cases. While he couldn’t completely put it behind him that she suspected Chrollo, he was also the only one he could feel at ease with asides from her. That in itself was a feat, for he could rarely ever feel as if he'd be able to let his guard down with someone he didn’t feel he understood one hundred percent, and yet… for some reason that didn’t apply to Chrollo. 

The more he got to know him, the less he doubted himself, and that eventually led him to asking the man out for lunch. From there, the relationship had taken off and into the current predicament. 

At that moment, Senritsu was about to say something else when he felt his phone buzz in the pocket of his jacket. The agent held up a hand to silence her, his brow scrunching together, but upon seeing the sender, he relaxed and smiled at his phone, causing his friend to scoff. 

“Sorry, I thought it was a message from work.”

“Instead it's your boyfriend, right?”

Kurapika blushed at the word, but nodded his head nonetheless. “Yeah, so I've got to get going. He says he wants to meet me before the end of the night.”

She raised an eyebrow at that, giving him a look that said she wanted detail when he got back. “So long as you're back before midnight, alright? We still have an office job to work during the day and I will  _ not _ be having my partner snoozing on me with all those files left to complete.”

The blond laughed at that, promising Senritsu he'd be back before that and set off in another direction, moving his way through the streets to Chrollo’s house. By the time he arrived, a slight fog had set in throughout the city, making all the strung up lights on the buildings look as if they were floating rather than attached together on high suspended wires.

When he got to the door, a maid opened the door, whom he recognized from the day previous. He smiled politely at them, but they seemed too keen on calling for Chrollo than responding back in any way, visibly going red for a reason he couldn't identify. That color again, he sighed inwardly to himself. It wasn't quite the same as the crimson from work, but it was still a haunting color. 

They turned back to Kurapika now, shyly averting their gaze as they asked if they could take his jacket. He was about to accept before he realized that he still hadn't changed shirts, the blood from earlier in the evening still be present on the white formal shirt, so he refused, saying he wouldn't be staying long to ease their nerves a bit. Thankfully, he quickly spotted Chrollo and moved towards him before the silence between them could stretch any longer. 

He was swiftly swept up into a warm hug, one he hadn't realized he'd been waiting for, before they set out for an adjacent parlor with a nicely lit fireplace inside. Chrollo gestured him to sit in a chair across from him, which he took with a bit of hesitancy, having sat in the office for most of the day filing papers on cases he hadn't done in weeks. They talked a bit about their days before Kurapika cut to the chase as to why he was there.

Chrollo put a hand to his neck, a bit of pink tinging his cheeks as he laughed nervously. 

“You see, I was kind of making small talk in hopes of putting this off a little longer, but I understand that you must have other plans for this evening.”

“Not much,” Kurapika shrugged, trying to make him feel better, “I've just got a lot of paperwork from the police station I want to work on so that I might get tomorrow off a bit early.”

His boyfriend nodded, his smile reappearing as he let the information soak in. “That sounds like something you'd do. Well, I know it's a bit early, but I did want to give you a Christmas gift before things got too hectic.”

The blond almost felt his eyes pop as he saw Chrollo bring out a small box.

“It's just a little something, not much compared to what you've already shown me, but really, after yesterday I feel like I haven't been putting enough into this relationship lately. I don't have a lot of traditions to share, but I do have quite a bit of money, so I feel like I might as well spend it wisely.” 

He hands over the box, a bit awkwardly since he quickly retracts his hand after giving it over. 

“I've never actually, uh, given something to someone like this, but I wanted it to be a bit unique. I went to so many places before I eventually just found someone to make exactly what I wanted and well… these are the results.”

Kurapika numbly nodded at him, trying to wrap his head around what was happening. He swallowed slowly, and opened the box carefully.

Inside the box was revealed to be a small, ruby gem attached to a small bead chain with a little semi circle at the top. A discrete earring meant for one ear, and as he looked back up, he saw Chrollo holding up one exactly like it, its twin. 

“I thought it'd be nice to have something to remind us of each other even on days we can't meet, and I thought rings were a little too official, and kind of even a bit flashy, but I hope you like it-”

“I love it.” He responded quickly, resolutely. The red from the ruby shined up at him, the fireplace giving it an almost lively look as he rolled it in the palm of his hand. 

Red.

While it's true he didn't like this color, maybe, just maybe, he's come to love this color as much as he loved Chrollo. 

“Thank you, it's beautiful.”

And it truly was, and he'd never take it off from that night on. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the views, kudos, and comments! It really motivates me seeing how much you guys enjoy this!


	3. DAY 3: PANIC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the third day of KuroKura Week 2016, Panic.

**D A Y   3 : P A N I C**

Sure, she could call Kurapika right then and there and tell him everything she knew, but what good would that do?

Senritsu sighed, running her hands through her hair; there’s no way she could do that now. 

Closing the laptop, she stood up and stretched, thoughts racing. She couldn’t tell him that she had run a background check anyways just because she couldn’t suppress the urge to. She had deliberately decided to check out his profile despite the social consequences,  and she found some inconsistencies, minor ones of course. Even in the most clean person’s records lay those, but she wanted to make sure because there was  _ no way she was wrong this time. _

She kept searching and digging, leaving her drink to precipitate next to her as she kept looking. He was good, this Chrollo guy was. His record was almost impeccable, nothing too outstanding and the worst trouble he’d been in was detention during middle and high school for suspected delinquent behaviours. An hour or so goes by with no leads, and Senritsu had started to think that maybe she had been over exaggerating. Maybe this time she was just so anxious that Kurapika had finally found someone that she was acting too much like what his parents would’ve been. Her head was in her hands, and she was starting to regret what she had done when she heard her computer  _ ping _ . 

Her head snapped up as the computer pulled up a inconsistency she hadn’t spotted the first time around. It was almost too small to catch when someone was speeding through so many profiles and web pages and newspaper articles, but here in plain site it was evident that  _ he was _ hiding something. 

One article said “a nearby bakery,” and another interview said “the company’s bakery.” 

Subtle, a bit odd, and perhaps he had simply liked the bakery he was talking about so much he had bought it, but she felt that wasn’t the case. She quickly searched it up, finding its coordinates easily, and then also a random article about it’s pastry and cake quality and then a newspaper clipping of when it had first opened. She clicked open another tab, searching the store’s name into their data base as she switched back to the company website. 

Why did a banking corporation own a bakery? 

While they were listed as a partnership, they weren’t actually apart of the company like Chrollo had implied earlier. Her computer  _ pinged _ again and she went back to the database, several hits coming up with suspected suspicious activity, all of which had been canceled or put to rest. She copied the list of the other associated companies and waited. 

Within the next few minutes, she had pages of reports on suspected activities from all the associated corporations, but that they had all been denied or that the cases had gone cold. How very suspicious. She typed in another search into the database, similar cases and crimes in close locations near these companies, and that’s when she found a part of a case that must’ve meant to be blacked out but wasn’t.

The mafia. 

Senritsu paused, shaking her head.

Impossible. She knew that she had a bad feeling about the guy, but the  _ mafia? _ There had to be some mistake. She started over, using the keywords of mafia and the town they were staying in for their major investigation, and found herself shocked. 

Her page showed up blank, a small box proclaiming she was not authorized to that particular set of information. That’s when the panic set in. How did her partner always find himself in the most trouble? She exhaled slowly, trying to steady her heart, this is  _ not _ what she signed up for. 

She brushed back her bangs, feeling as if the walls were closing in. Now for the internet to take over. 

She got more hits there, some of them forum pages talking about the Illuminati and pagan rituals, ultimately a waste of her time, but there were some interesting ones. Theory posts to be more exact, some tying certain locations to incidents she had read but hadn't thought to connect, but most importantly, it explained how the mafia was present. The user asserted that the local police were covering for them and how they were getting away with illegal activities for nearly a decade. She paused again, that time period sticking out to her. 

The banking corporation had first opened shop around eleven years ago, but the article had been published last year, meaning it was still very plausible the two were connected. She shook the hair out of her face as she caught herself leaning forwards the screen. She scolded herself for her bad posture before leaning back in the chair, thinking. 

Senritsu had a connection to the mafia, maybe not this particular one, but they all kind of knew each other in the underground network. It was a small world down there. She grabbed her phone and dialed his number, memorized by heart since neither of them could risk it being documented somewhere. 

It rang only twice before a gruff voice answered, a higher pitch one in the background saying something incoherent as the man started talking. 

“Melody, is that you? Man, it's been ages since we've talked! How are you doing? Our prodigy still doin’ alright? Y'all aren't in any trouble are ya’?”

Senritsu chuckled a bit, grateful to hear the familiar voice. “Yes it's me Basho, and we're both doing fine, though the CIA doesn't let up on these difficult assignments. We've been here for almost four months now.”

“Ah, your fault for wanting to work for the government and getting paired with meh' boy. Is he there? Could I talk to him?” 

“No, he's out right now. Maybe I'll tell him to call you later, but for now could you pass the phone to Baise?”

On the other side of the line she hears shouting, some shuffling of glass trinkets and rough parting phrase before another voice picks up as if the thudding in the background wasn't a body hitting the floor. 

“Ritsu darling, it's been forever since you've last called. What's been keepin’ ya’?”

“Work, as usual, which is unfortunately why I'm calling you now.”

Baise tutted on her end, shifting a bit in her seat as she grabbed a notepad. “Alright, hit me doll. Whatcha’ need?”

“Any and all info you have on the mafia in the town I'm located at, I assume you already know where we are.”

Baise chuckled, and it made Senritsu shiver with how cold it was. She's glad these people were her comrades and not her enemies. 

“You know us well. We wouldn't let you get away without us sending you some sort of care package while you were there, ya’ know? Well, I've got some information right off the top of my head if you'd like to hear it, or do you wanna’ wait till I've got the full report ready?”

She stopped. Did she really want to go through with this? Shouldn't she wait till she got Kurapika’s permission? She shook her head. No, that's already been tossed out the window and run over by semi-truck. She was going all in. 

“Tell me what you got Baise.”

“You got it. Organization name: Ryodan, or the Phantom Troupe as they're often called. There's usually little to no trace of their activity and they seem to have a good connection to their local police, often getting them the underground reputation of trying too hard, but some think they're working the system just right since they've often been imitated throughout the years since their origination. 

“They began really becoming known around thirteen years ago, starting off learning from other, bigger mafias, and going from there. Long story short, once they got enough ground in the underground field, they started up a banking corporation to hide their influx of profit individually and also to use in the future for gain and security. Seems it's been working out alright so far. 

“They have several established branches, and one of the main ones is where you live. It opened up a while back, can't recall now how long ago though, and I think they deal mainly with smuggling and other illegal trade.”

“Do you know anything about who's in the organization?” This was hitting close to home, and now she couldn't even rely on the police there to help her out with it. In fact, they'd sooner blame her death as dying in action than give up the mafia. What a mess she'd landed in. 

“Ah, not much at the moment doll, I’d have to get someone to hack their files, but the current boss is a guy that goes by Chrollo Lucilfer.”

She froze. This couldn't be happening. 

“Ritsu, hun? You still there?”

“O-oh, yeah. Yeah, sorry about that, just, writing stuff down is all.” She was startled back into responding, but she felt like her limbs were made of lead and like her hearing was dulled out. 

“Alright, well make sure ya’ burn it once you're done absorbin’ the information, we don't need that type of stuff goin’ public, ‘kay?”

“Yes, of course,” Senritsu smiled even though her friend couldn't see her. 

After a few parting words and a promise to call again soon that  _ wasn't _ for business, she hung up. All of this which led to her current predicament where she was now pacing up and down the living room. 

There's no way  _ in hell _ , she could tell Kurapika all this. She couldn't even fathom how he'd react let alone- she stopped mid stride, her ears picking up on the sound of a door unlocking. 

Kurapika entered not too long after, humming to himself as he did so, a smile gracing his features. When he caught Senritsu’s eyes, he came over to her more than delighted, showing off his brand new earring and telling her how he had been treated to a lovely dinner and how adorable it was when Chrollo was blushing and how great his jokes were and how-

Yeah. There's no way she'd be the one to break the news to him.

She smiled and nodded to him, urging him to go to bed despite the clock reading ten thirty. Thankfully he was in good spirits, because he happily obliged and went off to his room quickly, an extra pep in his step as he moved about the apartment. 

She needed a drink. Now. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm getting closer to posting within the day haha. Again, thank you so much for all the comments and I look forward to what you think of this chapter as well!


	4. DAY 4: PRESENT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that I dropped off the face of the Earth after the third chapter, I promise I never forgot about you guys. This chapter is a bit longer than the others specifically for this purpose, so I hope you enjoy!

**D A Y   4 : P R E S E N T**

“Sir, someone’s here to see you.”

Chrollo looked down at the clock on his desk. He wasn’t expecting anyone at this time. 

“Let them in.” He waved a dismissal to the butler, who left to retrieve the guest. Who could it possibly be? Unless…

He smiled to himself. A surprise visit from Kurapika? While he wanted to believe that, all the people in his manor knew who he was by this point, as he didn’t want the blonde feeling uncomfortable were he to stop by. Chrollo peeked up as he heard a knock on the door, and he forced himself to stop smiling before letting the guest come in. 

He recognized her immediately from the files he had received a couple months back, but he smiled politely as if he didn't know her at all. 

“Hello there ma'am, is there something I can help you with?”

“Yes, there is.” She stated curtly, pulling out a large manilla folder from her bag. “I know exactly who you are and what you've been doing for the past couple years here in this town. I also know you've had the police wrapped around your pinky finger since day one.” She dropped the file onto his desk which made a dull and residual  _ thump _ against the mahogany wood. “What I don’t know though is why you're dating my partner.”

Chrollo stayed silent, observing her for a moment before delicately lifting the first page of the folder over, quickly assessing the documents inside. She had certainly done her research. It didn't look like anything he had done over the past decade wasn't recorded and analyzed in thorough detail, even the things that weren't conducted in the town. She must have connections in very high places. He chuckled to himself as he closed it, leaning back in his chair as he returned her glare with a small smirk. 

“You're quite bold you know.”

“You're not answering the question.”

“My apologies my lady, or should I call you Senritsu? Is this all you're really here for? ‘Cause I'm a very busy person and this can't possibly be the most pressing-” a gun between his eyes stopped him from speaking any further as the woman across from him narrowed her own. 

“I want to know,” she said, voice dangerously quiet as she pulled back the hammer with a low click, “why you're dating Kurapika.” A pause. A log in the fireplace shifted uncomfortably. 

“Because I like him.” He replied simply, slowly, trying to not to provoke her anymore. “Please, put the gun away. If you want to talk, I can clear some time from my schedule to do so.”

A moment of silence passed between them as he watched Senritsu contemplating. If he recalled her profile correctly, she only shot someone else if they too were armed with a weapon, and even then she tended to be the more hesitant when someone's life was in her hands. If that held true in this situation, which he was beginning to suspect was losing hold, then she would take up his offer to chat, but if not… well, he really didn't want to think she'd threaten him any further, but he felt like he was dealing with a very overprotective parent and didn't doubt that she would stoop to using some more… concerning tactics.

Thankfully for him though, she still held a rational mind despite the situation and she slowly lowered her gun and put it back in her holster. He gestured for the agent to sit down in a chair in front of his desk, but she adamantly shook her head as she moved toward the couches set to the side. Sighing, he got up and followed her, a bit reluctant to leave the warmth he had created in his office chair. As they settled down across from each other, he observed her behaviour, looking for any indications of nervousness or a sense of unease. She was either really good at hiding it or she was naïvely brave, because she seemed to be exuding limitless confidence as she straightened her posture and looked him in the eyes, not faltering in the slightest.

“So what is it you want exactly?” He drawls after a while of silence, the fireplace, once again, the only noise to accompany them. “I get that you want to know why I’m dating him, but I want to know  _ why _ that matters.”

“You’re important to him.” She states clearly, her voice echoing in the room, making the bitterness she held towards that fact abundantly clear. “However,” her eyes clouded with a darkness that made Chrollo feel like he should be breaking out into a cold sweat, “he also happens to be fairly important to me too.” Senritsu smiled nicely, but it sent ice down his back.

“So you've come to stop this at the source? What do you want me to do, break up with him?” He sounded amused, but in reality there was a fear hidden in his shallow laugh, and he felt like she picked up on this. She continued to smile at him as she spoke, and while he wore a smirk of his own, it was all that was masking his inner anxiety now. 

“While I'd love to say that'd solve the problem, I'm afraid it won't be that simple. You see, you've ingrained your way into his everyday life and somehow made it so that you're an emotional pillar of his. I don't want to know how you managed this, but you did. If I told you to walk away from Kurapika at this very moment and you willingly obliged, it would tell me one of two things: that you prioritize yourself over him and that you don't really care for his wellbeing.” She paused as she took out another folder from her bag and set it on her lap with a small smile. “Fortunately for you, I specialize in psychological profiling.” 

_ Oh dear.  _

“Mr. Lucilfer, I can tell from your slightly rigid posture that you are on guard, but because it’s also slightly relaxed, it shows that you’re either conscious of this and trying to force yourself to loosen up, and or that you’re also anxious, maybe frightened by my presence.” Chrollo shifted in his seat as she said this, tilting his head to the side as if he didn’t know what she was talking about. She opened up her file now, and began reading the contents aloud. “Every photo I’ve seen of you, you’ve been wearing black, which indicates that you want to both intimidate others and appear cool and tough to them. As an orphan, you’re used to being ignored and seen as less, so while you don’t assert yourself, you are used to observing people more than you are interacting, which you use to your advantage in large group discussions to find and pinpoint weaknesses to exploit. You’re punctual, something many articles mention, so that tells me you’re very self-motivated and strong willed, mentally organizing anything you think will be important later on down the road, perhaps despite initial insignificance. Granted, this also means that an over stimulation in an environment you may not comprehend or have full control over flusters you and lowers your performance levels. This is a tactic you take on while going up against your enemies, though I'm sure you never quite realized that it was your own fear you were implementing.”

Chrollo scoffed, throwing a hand into the air as if in frivolous thought, “You can't actually be telling me you think I'm scared of something.”

She looked him dead in the eye with the most confidence and seriousness he'd ever seen from another human being before uttering her retort, “You're scared of losing Kurapika.”

He could physically feel the color drain from his face as she said that, and he knew there was no way he could hide it, but why?  _ Why _ was she right? He had thought he could move on from this whenever he so chose to but the thought of  _ actually  _ having to lose him like this, or maybe never seeing his smiling face again or hearing him tease his sense of fashion, telling him that his earrings looked silly but then making up for it by kissing his cheek - and he'd have to lose  _ that? _

Before Chrollo could dwell anymore on his thoughts though, Senritsu coughed purposefully, causing the mafia boss to look up quickly at her

“However,” she said, quieter this time, setting her file on the table as she asserted eye contact, “Kurapika doesn't care about any of that, or rather, he doesn't care because he doesn't know, and I intend to keep it that way.” She looked him over really quick before she stood soundlessly, beginning to pace besides the sofa. “Did you know that you’ve been adding color to your wardrobe since meeting him?” She nods at the silence that follows, and he shook his head as if he couldn’t find his voice. “Well, you have, and that combined with today's actions is all I need to trust you.” Chrollo shot up an eyebrow, disbelieving at her statement. There was no way-

“I'm well aware of your skepticism on my decision, however, like I said earlier, I can't just let you exit his life. Kurapika is keen, you should know this, and if he hasn't picked up any ill will from you, then…” she sighed, brushing back some of her hair as she looked away, making it the first time that she had broken eye contact the entire conversation. “Then I'll just have to give you a chance.” He widened his eyes as she continued, flustered with the attention. “I may not be fond of what you've done, but I've decided to judge you based on the present you, Chrollo 2.0, and,” she smiled nervously at him, “while he had a rocky start, he's not too bad of a guy in the end.

“I don't really care all too much about what the Chrollo of the past has done, I'm simply showing you that I know. I just want verbal confirmation that the current you, the you in the present, is trying; that you are trying to change, that you genuinely want to be with Kurapika, and that you are willing to sacrifice and give up part of your life for him.”

Chrollo sat in his seat, too stunned to speak immediately. He shook his head slightly as he sat up straighter, bowing his head as he searched the floor for answers. All of this was overwhelming. She was dangerous.  _ Very _ dangerous. She was friendlier now, but her tone told him she was still on guard. Senritsu probably had multiples of the folder she had given him and most likely had it backed up in several places somewhere online. Instead of using this information and handing it over to the government, she came to inquire about Kurapika. So, she placed her loyalty to her partner above that to her government faction. Interesting, but it's also all he had on her now. Her file would need updating. He looked up, wanting to read her expression, but found it very overwhelming attempting to do so. The fire reflecting in her eyes seemed quite real, like if he tried to lie or weasel out of his answer she would just  _ know.  _

“I want to change, for him.”

“Do you love him?” She inquired softly, asking in such a way that indicated she wanted an answer, but that he was free not to. 

“I love him.” This was a dangerous situation, and gods was Feitan going to filet him later, but the look of relief that passed through her eyes and the calm that came over him were so immense that he found himself able to forget about it for the time being. 

The statement hung in the air for a bit before Chrollo coughed awkwardly into his hand, leading him to fetch some water for himself. He could feel her gaze following him as he walked over to the pitcher of water on his desk. He was slightly disappointed to see the ice had melted, but refused to be picky about it now.

He drank as slowly as he could, reluctant to turn around and meet Senritsu’s gaze once more. He brought up a hand to wipe away some water from his mouth, and he realized his cheeks felt very warm. Horror dawned on him as he slowly closed his eyes. 

Of course he was blushing. 

He couldn't go the first hour of meeting Kurapika's probable best friend and deepest confidant without pissing them off, being threatened, and then swiftly embarrassing himself after trying to come off as cool. It seemed like legitimate relationships were still a struggle to him. Willing the blush to disappear, he cleared his throat as he moved back towards the couches. He opened his mouth to speak but found himself unable to voice his affection. She cleared her throat, Chrollo's eyes snapping to her as she moved over to him.

“I want you to promise me that you won't tell him of this meeting between us.”

He nodded solemnly, “Of course, neither of us want him figuring out too much before he needs to.” Senritsu nodded, grabbing her bag as she headed towards the door. 

“Oh, and I'm sorry about earlier,” she smiled sheepishly as her eyebrows scrunched together, “I probably didn't have to pull my gun on you to have this conversation.” Chrollo took a while to process it before he laughed aloud, relieved to have the atmosphere move away from being tense. 

“Consider yourself forgiven, I must say that was quite gutsy of you, and I'm actually quite impressed by your boldness, Senritsu.”

“Melody,” she started, her smile turning into a grin, “You can call me Melody, all my friends do.”

_ Friends… _ he blushed at the thought, coughing into the crook of his arm. “Yes, of course. Have a good day Melody.”

She beamed at him, and then left, the door closing softly behind her. He let out breath he hadn't known he was holding and rubbed at his temples. 

What the hell had just happened?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What indeed DID happen, haha. Tell me what you guys think by leaving a comment or just give a kudos if you think I didn't totally mess up lmao. I'll see you guys soon with the fifth chapter!

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what you think will happen next and what you thought of this chapter!


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